Tag Archives: Gawker.com

We’re Obsessed?

In my WordPress dashboard I can monitor the search terms that gets people to my blog. As much as I know and recognize that Facebook made me a loser it still pulls my heart strings in the wrong direction when I log on and see “Facebook Losers” has been searched in Google and they have trafficked to my blog. Ouch – but I’ll be fine, don’t you worry.

Anyway, to the point of the post. Celebrities. I’m not going to lie, I keep up on my tabloid news fodder. I started off reading Star just so I could get to the lengthy crossword puzzle in the back and then it escalated from just skipping through pictures to reading the articles bullshit.

My Idol<333

I don’t care that Lindsay Lohan is scared to be in jail because she’s claustrophobic, that Snooki got rid of her poof or if Mel Gibson is a raging lunatic. (Although after seeing for the Passion of the Christ my subconscious Jew loyalty boycotted any movie he was in/produced from then on). And yet if I don’t care why the hell do I continuously read TMZ.com, Gawker.com and obsess over DListed.com ??? (the guy who writes Dlisted.com is a comedic freakin genius…someone give this guy his own television talk show….I’d compare him to a gay man version of Chelsea Handler… actually, come to think of it, that pretty much describes Chelsea Handler)

My favorite Anti-Semite ❤

For me it’s like watching an accident. It’s just so ridiculously horrible that you can’t look away. The more bloody, unusual and heinous the longer you…err well the longer I stare. Because even when I read the tabs, I skip over the “good” stories and read only the train wrecks. Perfect Body? No thank you, I have ten pounds to lose. Happily Married? Don’t care, I’m still single. New Movie? Psh I haven’t even gotten my ideal career path on track yet. On the oh-so-delightful-other hand; Drug Addiction? Let’s hope it’s meth, everybody looks like a zombie on meth. Nasty Divorce? Haha, not actually the perfect couple you’re portrayed to be…how does it feel to be normal? Daddy Issues? Yes! Please make your therapy sessions public information, thank you.

Can you imagine being in the tabloids? Your whole life plastered around the world for strangers to gawk at and judge. And yet many people, including myself wouldn’t mind a stab at fame.

Muh Gurl Snooks

I think that there should be a common folk tabloid that’s sent to celebrities. It should be called Un-Famous, Homo-sapiens Digest or Real Life. Articles would be centered around our mothers clipping coupons,ARE THEY IN A FINANCIAL SINK HOLE?, sisters arguing about missing clothes, MISSING SUNDRESS: THIS MEANS WAR and friends gathering to hang out, JENNA AND HER FRIENDS HAVE A PARTY: MAYHEM ENSUES.

As boring as being normal is I’m sure even the regular person’s tabloid writers would find creative ways to take our ordinary lives out of context:

Jenna catches rays on the luscious beaches of Davis Park, NY with a friend...sources say it's her girlfriend

Jenna Pere was spotted at the Old Spanish Tavern in Oneonta, a close unidentified friend drops a bomb on her

A fight ensues - police refused to comment

This just in...Jenna is actually a vampire.

Add your own tabloid photos & captions to my Facebook Fan Page – If I get enough responses my next request will become a contest – prize included 😉

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Falling in Love on TV is Awkward

Going on TV to fall in love is all ridiculous. I understand Rock of Love and Double Shot with Tila Crackwhore, oops, I mean Tequila – because those people are semi-famous; so you’re bound to get your C-List career off to a great start. I do not understand the draw to be on The Bachelor or the Bachelorette, it has to be a huge publicity stunt.

There’s nothing special about any of The Bachelors or Bachelorettes. So why would any human being…never mind I just realized – PUBLICITY. Personally, I feel bad for the guys who don’t get any face time. They just wasted precious moments of their lives instead of working, spending time with their families or finding love in a more normal fashion. Anyway, these Bachelors & Bachelorettes, they’re just normal people; maybe they’re ultra good-looking but from what I’ve seen on TV they’re personalities really don’t impress me much.  But, Jenna, What if they really want to meet Jake/Ally and have a chance with falling in love? Shut up.

GAG ME WITH A SPOON

Reality TV is telling me that hundreds of guys watched the last season of The Bachelor? (What guys watch The Bachelor?!) And then on top of that they were so compelled by her good looks and sparkling personality that they just had to try out for a chance to vie for love on national television on a ridiculous realty fall in love show? You’ve got to be kidding me. Who even watches The Bachelor & Bachelorette besides the ladies from The View and the writers from The Soup? There’s no way I believe that hordes of men are tuning in every Tuesday night to watch that crap, let alone dream that one of those girls could one day be theirs.

AND THEN THEY’RE CAST – There also has to be something seriously wrong with these dudes.  They’re all living together, talking about their feelings to each other and the producers/confessionals? I don’t believe it, I’m calling B.S. –These guys ALL have to be actors. I don’t know one male who would be able to withstand any of that.  PLUS – at the end, if you win, you get engaged. WTF!? They’re filming for tops 6 months…who gets engaged after 6 months except crazy people?

They're eithe rlosers in real life or actors

Anyway, the reason I’m even wasting my time writing this post is because last night at the gym I caught a glimpse of The Bachelorette. Literally I didn’t have headphones so I was just staring at a TV playing The Bachelorette. After a while I really wanted to know what was going on because the blonde girl, the Bachelorette, Ally or something was all mad and running around like a crazy person. Thanks to gawker.com I now understand why the Bachelorette was so pissed.  One of her “boyfriends” was only on her show to be famous and actually had a real life girlfriend back in Canada where he is from. Call the WAAA-mbulance; no one cares.

This could work out for the guy. I think it can go two ways.

Way #1: All negative.

The only press he’ll get is from Page Six of the New York Post or Good Morning America during Kathy Lee’s segment; where they’ll make him come off as a chauvinistic cave man and then no one will ask about him again.

Way #2: He’ll be smart

If he’s smart concerning the television situation he just got himself into he’ll do some sort of expose. He should tell the public how the Bachelorette is filmed, the dirty laundry of the other guys on set, make an appearance on The Soup making fun of himself, interview with every tabloid he can find etc. I think if  he does all this, maybe he can even get bumped up the the B List.

Little side note: Went to a bar last Friday and saw a dude from MTV’s Tool Academy. His name is Angelo, he’s known as ‘Ripped Tool’. He’s not on any list. No one knew he was there, and no one cared. I didn’t realize I knew him from TV until we were about to leave, and then against my friends wishes I screamed in his direction “You were on TV, on Tough Love.” He probably felt really stupid, I on the other hand felt vindicated, I had figured out why I recognized this stranger…sort of.


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